Stay at home mom

This past Saturday we flew the two hour flight from London to Stockholm. Stockholm will be our home for a foreseeable future, not sure how long, not sure how short. Zoe made up for her crying on the plane from Copenhagen the week before by, hold on, sleeping the whole flight, even though it was not her naptime. She sat in her own seat (thanks SAS) between Mark and me, got a bottle for take off and leaned against me as the plane roamed into the air. She was asleep before even the flight attendants were allowed to stand up.

I have temporarily turned into a stay at home mom because we are waiting for the lovely affordable government subsidized daycare. When I called up the central daycare administration Monday they were very nice and told me I was number 47, but that I would have to talk to the local agency of my area. Another woman then called me up today and told me that 1) I would not be able to sign up before I had a person number (which takes 3 weeks from our in-person application that we did this Monday) and 2) that I had signed up in the wrong local area and would therefore be put in the back of the queue anyway, when I get my person number. Or more specifically Zoe's person number. I almost started crying. Holding back tears I said in my accented Swedish "But I need to go to work". I argued my case for a bit and after emphasizing that I had contacted them in February because I knew I was going to move to Stockholm and I knew that I needed daycare right away, the administrator softened. She promised to call my local daycare coordinator and tell her about the situation. "Sometimes things can happen quicker", she said almost as if she was providing me inside information, hinting at that magic that can happen if you play your cards right, even in the uptight bureaucracy of Sweden. I thanked her several times using words that were not normally used with official people here and hung up.

Non-Scandinavian readers might ask why I am not just getting a private child minder or even a part time nanny as we had in the US, so let me explain. Firstly, it is our aim to get Zoe into a daycare. I am a firm believer in daycare for children above 1 year and the quality here is high. Secondly, even a temporary private solution would be insanely expensive. Official prices of one-on-one childcare range from $30 per hour and up, almost twice what we paid in the US. This is the reason why private solutions to childcare do not really exist here, the quoted prices are for occasional babysitting, i.e. 1 day per week or evenings. So unless you have a grandmother who can look after the child for free you rely on the official channels here. Therefore I am a stay a stay at home mom at the moment.