Sweden has a reputation for high taxes and as much as I have yet to bring home a paycheck to witness this myself, I am increasingly getting a better understanding of where these go. Throughout the city there are publicly funded "open pre-schools" with teaching staff were parents can take their little ones for some socializing with other children and coffee drinking with other adults. They are not daycare as such but a place where the parents stay with the kids for a couple of hours. I knew about these public play groups from last year where I spent my early maternity leave in Stockholm, so the first weekday here I ran over to the closest one to get some adult interaction and for Zoe to see some actual toys (the one small bag of toys we brought with us, I forgot in New York, leaving her with a second-hand push-trolley from London, two dolls that her aunt gave her during her visit and the lego car her dad brought back from the US last week). True to my daughter's upbringing the thing she reached for as the first thing in this toy-heavenwas the giant plastic airplane. I helped her get it down from the shelf and for 10 minutes she was engulfed in putting little figures into the plane and taking them out again. I got to practice my Swedish but must admit I felt relieved when Zoe refused to stay in the circle of parents and babies when they started singing. Obviously also in Swedish.
This morning we went to another playground than the one two blocks from our apartment and I stumbled upon two English speaking moms. It was as if Zoe was gravitating towards them, reminding me that she does not understand a word of Swedish yet but must feel more comfortable hearing English. The moms had two girls each and they did not promote that whole big family very well. The American's oldest girl of 2 1/2 managed to take Zoe's purse out of her hands twice, making Zoe inconsolable and tempting me to wrestle it back with a vengeance. The Australian mother kept yelling at her older girl whenever the girl did something wrong, which obviously a 2 year old with a new little sister did a lot. I almost asked her how much time she spent only with her older daughter but realized that just because we immediately all bonded over the being foreigners in Sweden, she was not by best friend yet. Instead I accidentally thought aloud when they were about to leave and the older kid needed the bathroom *just* after she had been put in her snowsuit: "It must be so hard with two kids, this isn't a good example is it?" I could have bit my tongue but instead tried to cover up my unintended rudeness: "We all have our tough days, don't we?". The Australian seemed too caught up in trying to twist the kid out of the fluffy garments but then turned to me, handing over her 6 month old: "Can you hold her for a second?" I felt honored to be allowed to hold such precious little cargo and put her on my leg while kneeling down so Zoe could see her. The baby started crying a bit and Zoe went over, looking a bit puzzled. "There there", I said, padding the baby on her head and Zoe helped out. Together we comforted the baby and handed back a smiling girl when her mother returned. Perhaps I didn't make such a bad impression anyway. Perhaps this is a step in the right direction in terms of making friends. In any case I am going to be happy to pay my taxes.
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